Thinking of spring in this page from my nature journal.
Meditation.
I close my eyes and bring each person to mind who has been intricately woven on my path to healing and authenticity. First, I see the people I love most. I bring them into my heart and mind, feel their energy and warmth, their love and comfort. I am deeply cared for and emanate kindness and wisdom, allowing the feeling to move through my body. Slowly, the more difficult people on my journey come to mind. They have revealed the most to me. Each of these people has lit a fire under my feet, and a pain in my heart, one that would eventually become compassion. They are my teachers and these are my lessons.
Nature journaling continues.
**
I’m not a spotlight person and extra uncomfortable with many eyes on me or speaking in large groups. I’m most at ease in small groups with one on one interaction. There was a time in my life, not so long ago, that conversation with more than one person at a time would cause a deep anxiety and dissociative feeling to rise in my body. With a flushed face and shaky limbs I would escape as quickly as possible into quiet solitude.
This all changed when my son was born.
Suddenly, eyes and hands were everywhere and I had no choice but to talk, to engage, to be with people. Fearful or not, this was what was happening and I couldn’t run from it. At first I felt like an imposter in my own body and mind; morphed from an introvert into a near extrovert.
As it turned out, with each playground visit and picnic play date, each year passing, I became more and more of the person I wanted my son to know. I began to remove my protective body armor and claw my way out from deep underground, starting to like myself. Feeling compelled to change, I began showing him, and myself, what growth really looked like. Not clear and easy, but trial and error, humbling.
Spring renewal.
Beginning to realize the words of Mary Oliver and their undeniable truth, I found myself asking, “Who am I?” and “What do I want to leave behind?”
Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?
-Mary Oliver, Excerpt from The Summer Day
This required digging through layers of life that I didn’t want to revisit. But I had to. It was the only way to heal.
As time went on, I was no longer compelled to become my fullest self; I was driven. Through the powerful healing of art making and with the help of many, many people, I unraveled my past to fully embrace the present.
The best way out is always through.
Robert Frost
Today, my son is twelve and although I will always be an introvert at heart, seeking those times of quiet reflection and silent woodland walks, I also deeply respect and honor the connection of others. As this work continues, I am building this space, hoping to pass on healing and creativity through you and with you. It is not mine to give to you, instead, ours to offer each other.
**
Art and Hearth in Presque Isle, Maine is a project that planted itself in my mind as an idea that would bring community and creativity together. It was simple in concept-bring an art project you are currently working on, along with a snack to share, and join us for tea and connection. It has been wonderful and growing each month. Create and Connect in Patten, Maine is modeled off of Art and Hearth and our first meet up will be April 30th at The Orchard. I hope if you are close, you will join us.
Pictured above: The Library House at 228 State where Art and Hearth is held.
There is nothing quite like meeting with a group of people who like to make things. There’s an opportunity to learn, laugh, listen, and feel the energy of others all while your hands are busy.
I can’t replace this in person meeting but I do hope to recreate it with the Nature Drawing Collective, our biweekly online nature drawing group. It will be a bit different than Art and Hearth and Create and Connect as I will provide you with drawing techniques and skill building suggestions, journaling prompts and ideas each week to get you started. Of course, you don’t have to do any of my ideas and instead just join us to work on your own nature journal. The Nature Drawing Collective is not free and an offering to those who have pledged their support to this work ongoing.
If this is something you would like to add to your personal wellness or if you are trying to begin a creative practice, I hope you will join us.
Upgrade your free subscription here and receive my book Wandering Wild: Nature Drawing Collective companion guide and links to meet with us on the first and third Monday of the month at 10:00 AM or 6:00 PM
**
Some things that caught my eye this week:
is a mother, visual artist, and writer currently living in Toronto, Canada. Her beautiful paintings interpret intuition, folklore, mysticism, and the spirits of the earth, allowing the natural rhythms of life to flow. See her publication Multilayered. is a mixed media artist from Germany taking gorgeous photos of her hiking journeys and most recently making stunning hand bound books. See her publication My Morning Muse . is the work of JoJo and Barrie from Wales who celebrate all the amazing folks they discover on Substack. The Encouragement Manifesto supports, encourages and inspires so many people. See their publication The Encouragement Manifesto.**
Please share your thoughts, stories and bits of wisdom in the comments. If this resonates with you, please give a heart, share and restack as it all helps to push Layers Of A Creative Life out into the world. I appreciate you all so very much.
Wishing you a wonderful weekend and week ahead.
Char XXX
PS: This weeks guided tutorial is coming later today. I used a photograph of my husband’s for inspiration,
. I look forward to seeing your paintings!
When I moved to Maine almost 2 years ago, I thought I’d find an isolated life, which I wasn’t afraid of. Instead I have found a community, multiple communities actually of people from all walks of life, living day by day, and making the most of what they’ve been given. I’m more connected here in the middle of nowhere than I have ever been before but it’s in such a healthy way, nothing like I’ve ever experienced before. My life looks a lot different now than 2 years ago but it’s a beautiful life that I’m grateful for. Even on the hard days, it’s easy to find something to smile about.
Thanks for sharing your stories, Char. It makes me feel even less alone and more connected 💕